Thursday, April 30, 2009

One of the best forwards I have come across in a long long time.

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A little rabbit happily running through the forest stumbles upon a giraffe

rolling a marijuana cigarette. The rabbit looks at her and says, "Giraffe

my friend, why do you do this? Think about your health. Come with me

running through the forest, you'll see, you'll feel so much better!" The

giraffe looks at him, looks at the joint, tosses it and goes off running

with the rabbit.

Then they come across an elephant doing opium, so the rabbit again says,

"Elephant my friend, why do you do this? Think about your health. Come

running with us through the pretty forest, you'll see, you'll feel so

good!" The elephant looks at them, looks at his razor, mirror and all, and

then tosses them and starts running with the rabbit and giraffe.

The three animals then come across a lion about to take a heroin shot...

The rabbit says "Lion my friend, why do you do this? Think about your

health! Come running with us through the sunny forest, you will feel so

good!" The lion looks at him, puts down his needle, and starts to beat the

hell out of the little rabbit.

As the giraffe and elephant watch in horror, they look at him and ask,

"Lion, why did you do this? He was merely trying to help us all!"

The lion answers..... .....



That little devil makes me run around the forest like an idiot for hours

every time he's high on cocaine!"

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:)


D

Saturday, April 18, 2009

A story inspired by "You know who".

Chi was a bug. On the morning of July 3, he woke up as a human.

Like the millions of bugs around him, he lived a rather bugging life. His ancestral home, a hole under a tree in America housed Chi, Frieda(His wife) and their four thousand kids.

Everything seemed.... different.

"What have you done to yourself? What will become of us now that you have become a disgusting human." cried Frieda.

The elders, a group of 268 bugs summoned Chi to their castle in a bid to resolve the matter. "Are you Chi?" they asked. Chi answered, " Cant you see, has this metamorphosis blinded you to what lies beneath? I have worked with you all, lived with you all!".

Elders - "You are obviously an impostor. Chi was a bug, he is a bug, will always be a bug. You are a human who is trying to take his place. We bugs might be small but we are not stupid. Tell us who you work for and why are you trying to take Chi's place".

Try as he might, the elders refused to believe him. The trial was suspended and he was cast out of the gathering. He trudged back home to a morose Frieda.

"This is all your fault... You never thought about us once before turning into a human"

In anger he looked up to the heavens and cried out, " Why me god? Why play this joke on an insignificant bug?"

A booming voice replied, " Dunno.. I was kinda drunk last night"

D

Friday, April 03, 2009

Success!!

We finally got down to completing what we started, a quest to create flavoured cancer-sticks.
After our rather disastrous attempts to flavour tobacco(refer to previous post), we decided to adopt a different paradigm. Rather than flavour tobacco, we got hold of flavoured rolling paper!

A pouch of Golden Virginia stuffed into Jamacian Rum flavoured paper... smelt luverly when unburnt. At times like this I wish that ciggarettes didnt:
  • Cause Cancer
  • Leave you smelly
  • Give you such a fleeting rush
- Till such things happen I shall remain a non-smoker(Also, wannabe teetotaller).

On a different note, my school friends were back in Delhi for a brief chutti (Yay!). Met up at Cocoa, a place at Shitty Wok. Ok place, but the waiters khao more bhaav than a hot chick at an engineering college. Decided to stick to my resolution of no hard drinks, so ordered wine.. well.. who ever got wiped out by wine, right?

A coupla bottles later (Courtesy, well paid corporate honchos/best buddies) we were well on our way to La-La land...

New resolution: Only ice tea.

D

P.S. Off to Mcleod next week! :)